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July 29, 2008
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:iconpeaceinc:
"When we first met, I got injured during training, you heard me crash down and rushed to me in order of attending my wounds; my wounds, wounds of a Cyclonian trash as your people called us, your petit hands getting soiled in my traitorous blood.

You smiled at me and tried to make me concentrate on your ancdotes and whimsical questions instead of the pain, you were blabbering and stumbling in your speech as you treated my wounds ever so gently.

When you were done the pain was still there, I was far from being healed and we both knew it.
I don't remember what you did very clearly; all I could remember was hot breath on my exposed neck and sharp ripping pain throught my system.

When I regained my breathing, I forgot all about the pain, I couldn't fix my mind on the question 'what did you just do?' instead I asked you 'why?', a goofy smile that was so uncharacteristically me suddenly smudged all-over my face. You simply replied that whenever there's help needed for a wounded soldier, there would be a Paradisidae squadron member to help them heal.

Five years later I hunt you down and stole you to Master Cyclonis' court, to serve and help him and the young Heiress in the medical field around the palace. You didn't argue and struggle when I grabbed you and set off to the skies, your mother screaming in terror at the sight; oh no, you didn't even fidget, it is like you were waiting for me all along, instead of trying to get away from my deathly tight grip you just pressed to my chest, closing your eyes and sighing in relief.

Master Cyclonis was afraid of you greatly. He thought you were a dangerous spy which, he believed, explained your tranquilant attitude towards your current situation and position offer; you just stated, no - reminded him that Knights of Xerxes are, like their Terra, in the neutral position between the fighting sides of this war; therefore you don't have any objections.

Five years after that you are already the General of the Talons' medical and physiotherapic forces, Dr. Pax; the plan executor called with great tremble the "Mastermind"; thick glasses lay painfully on the bridge of your still freckled nose, you are still small just like ten years ago, barely reaching my chest. You wear those ugly glasses just to seem older, your petit and curvy form now hidden under an oversized General-Doctor's coat with the symbol I almost raped into you adorned on the back.

And still after all this time, I only see the one that I met back there in the thick forest of Terra Amazonia.

And you don't smile to anyone but me. The most sincere and warm smile I have ever been granted.

Even after all my wrong doings to you, you are still the same as the day we first met."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ughn... Trying my hand at writing and adopting my own style of drawing back. I hope you like it!

Characters are:

The Dark Ace (Younger about 19 years old) (C) Nerd Corp.
Miss.Ashtoreth "The Mastermind" Pax (Younger around 16 years old) (C) ~peaceINC / ~AniMango
:icon:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsilverenvy:
~SilverEnvy Sep 14, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:wow: THE STORY IS AWEMZING!!!!!!!!!

--
Pro-Gaymarriage! Judge not, lest ye be judged.

Love is perfect whoever it's between.
♂ + ♂ = ♥
♀ + ♀ = ♥
♀ + ♂ = ♥

Avatar by *Anime-Yokai-Mckai

My horse account ~SilverEnvy09
Reply
:iconpeaceinc:
Hah1 Thank you! ^^;

--
We trade Peace
Reply
:iconsilverenvy:
~SilverEnvy Sep 15, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:D Welcome :hug:

--
Pro-Gaymarriage! Judge not, lest ye be judged.

Love is perfect whoever it's between.
♂ + ♂ = ♥
♀ + ♀ = ♥
♀ + ♂ = ♥

Avatar by *Anime-Yokai-Mckai

My horse account ~SilverEnvy09
Reply
:iconviistar:
lol i love the expression on DA's face! such a goofy smile :giggle: i love it!

hm... for critique... i would suggest dropping the background and creating a more pronounced focal point (which is the characters, their hands and faces) by using less detail and making the line weight thicker around around the main forms, pushing the background back and the foreground forward (something i myself have been working with)

other than that i like how you're simplifying the cloth folds, it works really well, and the expressions and colors are fantastic!

keep up the good work!

--
I'm alive in that non-committal sort of way... as in i reserve the right to die again at any time.

Stirb nicht vor mir.

:dummy: BUSTER:dummy:
Astral kissies all around! --> ‎(@3@)~ ちゅ ちゅ
かっとビングだぜオレ!
Reply
:iconpeaceinc:
When I read "...using less details." I felt my heart pinch with terror! xD
Details is what I live for!

Hmm. You are right about making a thicker line tho', I've eard it many times before, but was too forgetfull to actually do it hurhur.

*What do you mean by "creating a more pronounced focal point"?

And hell yeah I'd like to have that amazing perspective caption you have! But not all of us are as talented T3T...



Thank you! :heart:
~Miss Mastermind

--
We trade Peace
Reply
:iconviistar:
hmmm... well....
i myself use lots of detail and have run into the same issue... you need to be able to discern the background from the foreground figures.
[link]
illustrates this in the extreme.

there is no way for the viewer's gaze to be drawn to the focal point which is the game between the traung and his master.

a thicker line width may work but when it comes to segregating background from characters, controlling detail is the best way to go.

what i mean by create a pronounced focal point is about controlling the viewer's gaze and being able to dictate where they look. your piece is narrative, telling the story of the interaction between two people.

but it it difficult to notice her hands and their faces because everything is at the same intensity. (color, detail, lineweight) some of these need to give way to make a piece more readable (as the viewer is likely to get lost in the foliage).

to make a piece stronger, first decide where you want the viewer's eye to go and make it the most detailed, and the action clear. then take the rest of it in stages. (as in background to foreground so the viewer is directed through the piece)

keep in mind atmospheric perspective, where closer objects have saturated color, higher detail, and more contrast.

[link]
is a good example of detail controlled through value. the focal point is the lightest area, and though everything is highly detailed your eye is escorted to the first read (the beauty and the beast) and then around for a second read of the detailed room.

i have some profs helping me with this at school, and just inking with controlled line weight helps so much, but it feels like i'm starting from scratch ^^;

should you have any questions do not hesitate to ask :3

--
I'm alive in that non-committal sort of way... as in i reserve the right to die again at any time.

Stirb nicht vor mir.

:dummy: BUSTER:dummy:
Astral kissies all around! --> ‎(@3@)~ ちゅ ちゅ
かっとビングだぜオレ!
Reply
:iconpeaceinc:
*sigh* I used to preform all the points you just stated, in my art, somehow I'm losing touch :(.
I can't wait to finish my army service so I could apply to a good art school!
Damn you army! Damn youuuuu!

Hmm.. I am more than sure now that I need tutorials... Many of them.. Because studying the Dark ace and Ravess takes my attention away >__> Curses!

Thank you for offering help, I'm always in need for advice so...~! <3


*What about the story? (my first time at writing) and comments?

~Miss. Mastermind

--
We trade Peace
Reply
:iconviistar:
yeah, it's difficult to get going, but once it becomes intuitive, you create pieces incorporating those tips without even thinking... and that's the best place to be :3

i keep working and if i learn anything else i'll pass it along ^^

lol studying dark ace and ravess! i'm working on some fanart of the main cast in different costumes :aww: didn't think i'd be doing more fanart, but i always go back. it's relaxing ^^;

i don't write much myself, but after my finals are done next week i'll read it and give you some feedback if you want! :3

--
I'm alive in that non-committal sort of way... as in i reserve the right to die again at any time.

Stirb nicht vor mir.

:dummy: BUSTER:dummy:
Astral kissies all around! --> ‎(@3@)~ ちゅ ちゅ
かっとビングだぜオレ!
Reply
:iconpeaceinc:
Yes. Ravess has my soul.

Oh! good luck on the finals!

--
We trade Peace
Reply
:iconviistar:
thanks! ^^

--
I'm alive in that non-committal sort of way... as in i reserve the right to die again at any time.

Stirb nicht vor mir.

:dummy: BUSTER:dummy:
Astral kissies all around! --> ‎(@3@)~ ちゅ ちゅ
かっとビングだぜオレ!
Reply
:icon:
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